By: A Person Who Accidentally Checked the News

One country blinked and its currency fainted. Another held elections so dramatic they deserved background music and a slow clap. World leaders are flying across continents to hold emergency meetings only to announce that they will hold another meeting soon. Progress.

Climate change is now so aggressive that winters are confused, summers are angry and rains arrive like uninvited relatives. Ice is melting, forests are on fire and somewhere a billionaire is planning a vacation to space because Earth is clearly doing too much.

Meanwhile, social media is deciding global mood swings. One tweet causes markets to dip, another starts a diplomatic apology tour and a third is immediately deleted with the classic “account hacked” excuse. Sure.

Wars are explained with maps no one understands. Peace talks happen, break down, resume and then politely pretend they never happened.And through it all, citizens are advised to remain calm, resilient and productive.

The world is not collapsing. It is simply freestyling without a script.